So, Cece posted the other day about wanting kids when she’s grown up. I want to talk somewhere along the same line.
Loneliness is one of my biggest demons, second to anxiety. Whereas many people get nostalgic for younger, simpler times, looking back on when they felt pure and unadulterated joy when with a childhood friend, I tend to get choked by longing. Kind of like reverse-nostalgia.
I want to be older. I want to live in LA, become a youtuber. I want to write and draw and be with someone that I love and that loves me in return. That last one, the sheer not-being-able-to-seriously-be-with-someone part, is what I hate the most.
This is just a stupid fantasy, but I want to have a really good friend, you know? Someone who I can be me around. Someone who I can snuggle with without it being weird. I see him in my mind and I imagine that one night, were snuggling and we look at each other and everything stops. It’s just us. We lean in and kiss and it’s amazing to finally realize that I’m in love with my best friend.
But if I am ever to fall in love, it won’t happen like this. My mind constructed this fantasy.
I have always wanted kids. Ever since I, myself, was a kid, I’ve wanted kids. And now that I have come to terms with who I am, I realize that there will now be many complications. But, somehow, I know that I can’t let complications hold me back from my dreams. I want kids and I will, someday, have them.
That sounded creepy but I hope you understand what I’m saying.
My overall point is this: do not let people or ‘complications’ hold you back from your dreams. I may be young and right now, all my wants seem to be so far away, but I can get through everything and eventually live the life I know I deserve. And so can you.
You are all so wonderful. Keep telling others about us and if you have anything you want to say, leave a comment down below!
This is Kermit, signing off.